WRITING: Shoot the Neighbors

When I went to NerdRage in Philly last month to see my long time friends in Scrub Club, I had the pleasure of talking to King Pheenix for a long time about many things. Among them he hinted that he and Madhatter would be working on an album of political rap in the near future.

King Pheenix from Scrub Club Records

King Pheenix from Scrub Club Records. Image borrowed from scrubclubrecords.com

I’ve been a bigger fan of political rappers (Public Enemy, KRS-1, etc) for a LONG time, so I was tickled to hear this was coming down the pike. Unfortunately for you, it also has me thinking in rhymes now, which means there will probably be bad political poetry appearing here more frequently. Who knows, maybe KP or Hatter will find something among these they can use or that inspires them to something better.

Anyway, here’s your torture for today…

Let’s go shoot the neighbors / they knocked down our tree / we could just call the cops / but what fun would that be?
Let’s go shoot the neighbors / they’re way out of line / I loaned them my chainsaw / to get Jim’s tree, not mine.
Let’s go shoot the neighbors / and if their neighbors cry foul / we’ll be lobbing grenades / over there in an hour.
Let’s go shoot the neighbors / until they see things our way / or just kill them all / they’re not like us anyway.

Shoot the neighbors! Raise your guns to the sky!
Shoot the neighbors! Hold ’em up real high!
Shoot the neighbors! Don’t warn ’em, just aim!
(and) Shoot the neighbors! ‘Cause peace is so lame!

Let’s go shoot the neighbors / you gettin’ lippy now Bob? / You know you have to drive by here / to commute to your job.
Let’s go shoot the neighbors / Chuck, I need to use your yard / to get over to Steve who / thinks he’s all big and hard.
Let’s go shoot the neighbors / I’ll shut down this whole street / until every last one of you / swears allegiance to me.
Let’s go shoot the neighbors / and whoever makes it through / can come to my yard / for beer and barbeque!

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